Introduction to Australian Children's Literature
‘We are defined by our relationships with other people: they challenge and change us and so make us what we are.’
Introduction
Relationship has a big impact in our life as it portrays a vivid picture of our character. In human development, social relationship is vital in creating a happy and a meaningful life. Relationship matters in life as they can reinforce positive self-views or negative self-views. This means that social interaction has both positive and negative influence in creating self-identity. Various studies assert that many people develop their self-identity during the adolescent age. During this critical time, people view different pictures in life with respect their connection with family and peers. The interaction with different friends is associated with cognitive, physical and social changes which creates a complex process in creating self-identity. People need close interaction for them to solve problems, share responsibilities and reach into their destiny. The important thing is to understand each other, learn new behaviors and gain mutual empowerment. Human life is sustained by interpersonal relationships which influences behavior and changes the way of doing things. Relationship completely changes our behavior and defines our positive or negative self-identity.
Relationships define who we are in that through our behaviors, people can understand the family as well as the society we grew in. For example, individuals create the first interaction and relationship with their families and other people are able to identify your character focusing on your family, society and culture (HUMBERD & ROUSE, 2016). Family relationship makes a person to have a self-identity either positive or negative. For example, if a person is rejected by the family, he or she can change the behavior, lack self-worth, become desperate and live a less meaningful life. A clear demonstration on effect of relationship in person identity is portrayed in the novel “The Ruins of Gorlan”. Will is a character who is about to lose hope but his life is changed completely by a relationship. The character is a protagonist and he is raised by Baron Arald in the Castle Redmont with other orphan children like Alyss, Jenny and George. Since his father died as a hero, Will has a dream of following his father’s footsteps and become a hero (Flanagan, 2006). At the age 15, orphan children in Castle Redmont are chosen to be apprenticed but Will is humiliated by his friends as he is under age and he cannot enter in the Battle school. Halt asserts that "The boy has the potential to be trained as a Ranger. I will accept him as my apprentice (Flanagan, 2006 Pg. 41). Though he is not matured like others, Battle master (Halt) notices that he is agile, curious, brave and honest. Halt and Willy creates a relationship to an extent that he is trained on how to enter in the Battle. Shortly, Will enters in the Kalkara Battle and destroys the devil. This clearly shows that Will forms a meaningful relationship with Halt and the relationship defines his self-identity in becoming a hero.
As human beings, we make strong friendship with important people and family members with an aim that they will change our behaviors and if possible become like them. It is important to understand that relationship has two purposes either to strengthen or to weaken our identity. In the novel, “The Ruins of Gorlan”, Will is influenced and transformed and his self-identity is strengthened. He is distrustful with Halt and views him as strange and upsetting. Later, he comes to know that he is not only the best friend but also a mentor and a father. They create a strong relationship to an extent that Will is determined to copy Halt’s character and become like him. Halt not only acts like a mentor toward Will but also like a father. Will develop being respectful, loyal and champion and these qualities are as a result of their meaningful relationship with Halt. This clearly shows that a person creates a positive character out of the kind of relationship he or she engages in (Flanagan, 2006.
In the entire life span, peer influence is interrelated with personality development. People meet different friends from community, school, and working places and other places. In life, people tend to maintain a dyadic relationship with people who later change the character and define who you are. The researchers on relationship influence of self-identity have found that relationship with others is interconnected with feelings, behaviors and feelings (Kiran-Esen, 2012). In the social environment, people understand the identity of others and the interaction play role in personality maturation. The personality development which a person gains from peer at young age becomes a greater determinant of the self-identity a person will have in adolescents. For example, ‘Rowan of Rin’ is a novel which shows that Rin is a young person who is despised by the community because he is weak and coward. A time comes when the stream of water which is used by the community dries up. Seven Villagers have to go to the mountain to find out the cause of the problem so that they can save the bukshah. When they arrive there, they find a dragon. They lack power to kill the dragon and finally they decree that “The smallest and weakest of us proved the strongest and bravest in the end” (Rodda, 2001 pg 56). The villagers consider him as useless and weak but finally he is brave, courageous and becomes a hero.
Relationship defines the self-identity as it has an impact on personal recognition and hence identity construction. Relationship is an important factor in social life as it provides valued norms and behaviors to follow. In cognitive psychology, causal relationship represents the personal identity (HUMBERD & ROUSE, 2016). Research shows that there is a reciprocal relationship between society and personal behavior and the self-identity is created the societal interaction. In adolescents’ age, friendship matters in that this is the age in which many people tend to define their identity and so they engage in meaningful relationship to avoid identity confusion. The author asserts that physiological development of a person is influenced by peers, family, school and these factors playa great role in shaping identity. According to the theory of identity development, peer pressures have both positive and negative influence in identity development or else it contributes to both identity and identity confusion (Kiran-Esen, 2012). For example, it contributes to negative identity in that a person can be engaged in drug abuse. At adolescent, friends engages in similar behaviors and their strengthen each other to break the rule and act against the parents and society regulations so that they can gain self-esteem and fulfill their needs (Kiran-Esen, 2012).
Focusing on negative effective of relationship on self-identity, the story on Hitler’s Daughter by Jackie French show that self-identity is defined by relationship. This is story within a story where the young students waiting for the school bus learns that Heidi is the daughter of Hitler and she lives with her guardian Fraulein Gelber. Heidi lives a secret life and she does not disclose that her father is a killer. Mark is affected by this story as he cannot imagine that Heidi has a close relationship with a killer father. He asks that “If everyone…thinks something is right, but you know it is wrong, what do you do then? (French, 2000, pg 116). This shows that family relationship affects their children and defines their self-identity. Mark believes that there is a moral dilemma as parents do engage their children to wrong behaviors. As his father has evil acts, his child Heidi also inherits the acts and follows her father’s footsteps. Therefore, relationship changes behavior and people acts in a way which will fulfill their friends’ needs. According to the nature of friendship, some friends are unreliable and they do not influence the self-worth. They make life to be difficult as they shape the personality through negativity (French, 2000).
In showing how people’s behaviors are defined by relationship, many authors’ focuses on self and identity from young age to adolescence. Young children aged 4-5 start to develop social skills and new abilities which helps in creating self-identity. In development, children move through transition process of social exterior and physiological exterior (Kornienko et al, 2016). A difference in self construction occurs when children focus on global construct where self-identity formation becomes multidimensional and complexities in defining one’s real and idea selves. In global construct, there is an increase in differentiation and at adolescence, children develops a high level of reasoning in creating self-identity and behaviors. In early adolescent, children focus on psychological aspects in creating self identity and overlook the physical aspects. At this time, they tend to take concern on their inner life so that they can set a realistic self-system (Kornienko et al, 2016). The author points out that, the adolescence age is a period of self-evaluation and the behaviors which are created at this age are defined by the type of relationship. The latter at this point play a significant role in shaping behavior in that it contributes to social changes. In the cognitive shift from childhood to adulthood, social relationship has a great effect on children lives. During social interaction, many children focus on external standards and responds to other people’s reactions. At this age, they are unable to value their personal lives or to apply comparison skills. They are influenced by social-comparison and so they develop their self-identify with respect to the social context. Their self-identity is defined by peer relations because by being disconnected with their families, they engage in social environment which shapes their behaviors and defines who they are (Kornienko et al, 2016).
In cognitive development, parental relationship with children defines their self-identity in adulthood. This means that the cognitive development is an important state which children gains self-esteem and self-identity. For example, if children experiences corporal punishment, at young age, Oates 2011 asserts that at their adult age, they will develop aggressive behaviors (HUMBER & ROUSE, 2016). This shows that the relationship between a child and parents determines the character which the child will follow in adult life. Other relationship which can define the self-identity is the relationship with social media. The latter influences the social psychology and interpersonal relationship. It is important to note that psychological functions provides inner self-identity and develops the process of individuation. Children use the internet as a self-motivator of meeting their psychological needs. During this process, a large number increases role confusion’ as they are unable to measure the quality of identity (HUMBER & ROUSE, 2016).
Conclusion
Friendship is an important aspect in people’s live. In essence, many people value friendship at adolescence age. This is a critical time in which social interaction is valued in sharing ideas, making decisions and more important shaping behaviors. However relationship is associated with positive and negative aspects as it has a strong influence in self-definition. It can either create a high self- esteem and positive self-exploration and it can also contribute to low self-esteem and negative self-exploration. All these are determined by the type of friendship a child or an adult engages in. Relationship play role in creation self-identity and the latter defines who we are in terms of behavior and culture. Social interaction influences self-identify and people tend to understand others by looking on their social connections. Researchers on relationship and its effect on self-identity states that, the latter is influenced by social interaction in terms of shared believes and practices. Life becomes meaningful through distinct elements of interaction such as class, race, age and more. Through interaction, people develop new ways of life and create self-identity.
References
Flanagan, J. (2006). The ruins of gorlan: Ranger's Apprentice Series, Book 1.
Rodda, E. (2001). Rowan of Rin. New York: HarperCollins.
French, J. (2000). Hitler's daughter. Sydney: Angus & Robertson.
HUMBERD, B. K., & ROUSE, E. D. (2016). SEEING YOU IN ME AND ME IN YOU: PERSONAL IDENTIFICATION
IN THE PHASES OF MENTORING RELATIONSHIPS. Academy Of Management Review, 41(3), 435-
- doi:10.5465/amr.2013.0203
Kiran-Esen, B. (2012). ANALYZING PEER PRESSURE AND SELF-EFFICACY EXPECTATIONS AMONG
ADOLESCENTS. Social Behavior & Personality: An International Journal, 40(8), 1301-1309.
Kornienko, O., Santos, C. E., Martin, C. L., & Granger, K. L. (2016). Peer Influence on Gender Identity
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doi:10.1037/dev0000200
